January Update

Dear Family & Friends,
Wow, this month is going fast(for me) and slow (for Marty). The pace will pick up a bit now as we have his appointment with Dr. Promad Sharma in Salt Lake City on the 23rd. So don't be worried if you try to reach us and neither of us is home.
We are hoping for good roads and a good report. Two events Marty was able to do this week were going with me to the Bear Lake Memorial Hospital after Christmas party and going to Sacrament Meeting. He has cooked a few meals---which makes him feel more back to normal. He continues to try to do the best he can each day and get the nutrition in that he so desperately needs. I am proud of him.
Thanks for checking on us,
Love, LaRee and of course, Marty

January 13, 2008

Dear Family and Friends,
It seems unreal that it was five months ago today (Aug 13,2007) that Marty had his first surgery in Logan and his cancer was finally diagnosed. Time has gone so fast in many ways, yet stood still in others. When I think of all the choices he has had to make and all that he has endured, it seems unbelievable. It is heartbreaking to look back in time when we both KNEW something was seriously wrong and told doctors we suspected cancer long before the diagnosis was officially made that day. It is impossible to fight cancer until an official diagnosis is made and then you know which beast you are fighting. Stage 4 is a bad time to start the fight!!
We continue to be grateful for the innovative and aggressive treatments now available for this type of cancer and will never forget Dr. Sharma's comment that THIS is the type of cancer people die from----not knowing what they had. It is usually diagnosed on autopsy. WOW ! The many symptoms that he had endured and been treated for one by one all added up WHEN THE DIAGNOSIS was documented by the pathology in surgery. It all seems like a repeat of Linda's cancer (my sister). Her list of complaints and doctors she had gone to for help were long. She was so discouraged because the good news was that there was nothing wrong with her (according to the many tests that were run on her) and the bad news was she could not get our of bed. When one of her last attempts for help got her a "pych consult for pain management", she called to tell me "they think I'm crazy". Shortly thereafter, bold physical manifestations made the diagnosis of Stage 4 NonHodgkins Lymphoma easier--and she got the doctors ATTENTION then. Suddenly, there was MUCH that could be done. She fought hard and valiantly......but at stage four!
I guess this is my way of saying to all of you that when you don't feel good and you KNOW something is not right, be proactive and assertive and keep trying to find the answer. Sometimes the problem does not clearly proclaim itself. Some cancers and other problems are hard to diagnose at their onset.
I am grateful every day that Marty chose the brave choice to have the surgeries and radiation, but it has taken a great toll on him. He is trying now to regain his strength, but it is slow and unpredictable. In my last post, I said that he was trying to wean off some of the many meds because each med may come with its own set of side effects. Now, he is on 3 more. One is for the neurological pain he is having on his face, neck, chest, back, arms and hands that was so alarming to him and it really is seeming to help. Two are for the fungal infection in his throat that has returned-- probably, in part, from the antibiotics he continues to be on.
Although we keep having unscheduled things happen, our next scheduled appointment is to see Dr. Sharma,Oncologist Surgeon, on January 23rd in Salt Lake.
I am grateful to be back to work and am so grateful for my job and the Blue Cross I have for him through my job. It has been overwhelming enough with insurance and the generous benefit Simplot held for him. I have seen many patients who have NO insurance!
Marty is experimenting with more and more foods and drinks, but trouble swallowing and tolerating the painful throat is an ongoing problem. The list of foods that work is getting longer, though it always depends on the day if something works or not.
He has tried to "putter" around the house and garage--there is so much that needs to be done. But, he does not have much stamina and the thermostat of his body is very fragile. He is usually too cold or too hot. And, he is shaky so much of the time. Simple things like writing a check or managing a spoon are difficult with the shakes. I see improvement in many areas and when he is not trying to do something, I see that he is thinking about and hatching a plan for how he could get something done. That usually involves asking for help--which we all know is difficult for him to do.
Last week was Fast and Testimony meeting. Marty got up and was only able to speak for a few minutes, but said so much in those few words and minutes. He almost blacked out as he turned from the pulpit. Don Crane grabbed him and assisted him back to his seat. He only stayed for that one meeting, but I was so proud of him.
We continue to feel blessed by the love and caring of so many. We are also aware that there are so many others around us with huge problems. I constantly hear courages stories and know so many people are enduring their own trials.
Thank to all,
Love, Marty and LaRee

Happy New Year 2008

Dear Ones,
Hello, we are still here and the battle continues. I am so proud of Marty for he continues to be a valiant and courageous patient. I have told several people that though I have never seen him in a weaker state of being than he is now,in my mind he has never been tougher ---- in all the ways that count.
Yesterday, he was seen in Dr. Clark's office and more antibiotics have been called in today. He is also going to try to wean himself of some of the many medications he has been on. He was already wondering how much of the way he feels is related to the MEDS. So, he is going to try to take less, but was cautioned not to just go cold turkey and stop everything. We got very little sleep last night and yet today is going a little better. Brandon, Curtis and Josh have all offered to help with anything Marty needs help with today and Steve is out there now plowing our driveway with his truck and blade. Deidra has sped to town to get Marty's perscription before the drug store closes. Angie continues to call and check on us as have Chris and Misti.
We appreciate the concern and love and physical help that all the kids, so many family members, so many friends and community members have been to us. I would say that we are starting out the year with grateful hearts. We are also discouraged that Marty, now past the surgeries and radiation is NOT feeling better than he is. Each day presents new and challenging problems and he struggles in new and different ways. I have never seen him be more tough.
We had a wonderful Christmas and continue to be touched by the generousity and kindness of others. I could write a book with each chapter being a touching, unbelievable story.
We did not make New Year's Resolutions this year, We hope to just make daily resolutions and try to do what's most important each day. Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. Love,
LaRee, and of course, Marty.

Enduring to the end.......

Dear Family and Friends,
It seems impossible that the year is coming to it's close. Marty is doing better. We can all see that he is getting stronger. He has a really good day and then perhaps an awful one, but things are better. He is NOT tolerating the cold at all!!!
And, we have plenty of that here this week. It has been bitter, yet we've had new snow. Whatever happened to "it's too cold to snow" ?? Life's Rules that I've spent 55 years learning are just being broken right and left!!!
Thank you for keeping us in your prayers and thoughts. We also pray for so many of you who are also facing challenges each hour of the day.
We are NOT making New Year's Resolutions this year. Last years look pretty hilarious (and sad) as we look back on them. We will just make Daily Resolutions and hope we are able to keep those. I sent out so few Christmas cards this year, but somethings just had to go undone. We hope your holidays have been filled with lots of love, laughter and warm fires and love. Belated Merry Christmas and a Very Happy NEW YEAR !! Love, LaRee and ,of course, Marty.

December 14, 2007

Dear Family and Friends,
Our days have been like a rollercoaster ride the last 10 days. I apologize for the big gap since my last post. Part of it was time, but some of it was that we always seemed to be waiting for the results of something before reporting the news.
There actually was a great reason I did not write, I think. For, if I had written even 5 days ago, it would have been a very gloomy and pesimistic report.
However, today I can just RAVE about how great Marty is doing. We went to his two Salt Lake doctors , Dr. Ying Hitchcock and Dr. Promod Sharma, for followup visits. (We will be seeing a lot of them this next year, I see.) Both did thorough exams and both told him he is doing great. They are thrilled with his progress. Neither was impressed by his week long inpatient hospitization with a wicked Strep infection and fevers up to 104 degrees, the open draining site on his neck, his violent shakes or his low energy and stamina to walk or stand for any length of time. Their standard reply to all was that these are very typical with the extent of his cancer, surgery and radiation. WOW.
They approved going ahead with getting some evaluations and starting on the denture problem. We were in Dr. Timothy's office the next day @ 8:30 am. I could not beleive how quickly the preliminary adjusting of the existing dentures were made and he walked out of the office with his teeth in. No, I'm not kidding. WOW. As you can imagine, with both doctors applauding his progress and getting the go ahead on teeth, his spirits are lifted immensley. We were both just so releived at how things went and he has just had two great, but tiring days. He was just exhausted by 9pm. But, he had done so much that it was a good tired.
We have so much to be grateful for this year. I feel just having him alive and healing is my best Christmas present ever. I hope neither of us take anything for granted ever again. We never go to sleep without saying "I Love You" and I never leave for work without telling him---even if I am waking him up to tell him. We have always been pretty good to do that, but now it is 100%. I recommend it to all.
Now, I have got the tree up and a few other decorations around the house. Marty has made sugar cookies once (with the promise of more) and one batch of Christmas cake. I still may consider the blog my Christmas card this year, but don't be surprized if you get an actual card from me, too. I do love getting cards and sending them and have already received so many nice ones.
Please know that we appreciate each and every kindness that has come our way. The list of people who have called, sent cards, rendered acts of kindness, sent gifts or money, put Marty's name in the temples around us, prayed for Marty and our whole family, made visits to our home or the hospital............is a long, loving list.
You know who you are and what you have done and it is all appreciated.
After serving as Relief Society President for 5 years, I thought I had heard of every kind & thoughtful way people show their love and willingness to help others. However, we have seen so many new and wonderful ways people show their love and concern through Marty's illness. I could write a book.
Happy Holidays to all, Love, LaRee, and of couse, Marty

Yes, Interesting !

Dear Family and Friends,
The test that I said was interesting became even more interesting after I added a note to the blog yesterday. Marty caught me on the cell phone and said "Get home now. They are taking me to Pocatello in 15 minutes!" I headed home as visions of complications and an ambulance run danced in my head. What actually had happened was that after Marty's WBC tagged blood was injected back into him and it was time to do the scan, the machine malfunctioned and the scan could not be done. The Nuclear Medicine tech came up with an idea to salvage the test and TOOK Marty (and I) to the Portnuef Digital Imagining clinic, where the scan did get done before it was too late. The test is very time sensitive and the scans have to be done in a certain window of time. He explained to us that there may need to be a scan as soon as we arrived & again at 8pm & maybe later. The receptionist who greeted us was surprised we had already arrived. (It was quicker than any ambulance run I have been on from BLMH to Poky). Of course the insurance cards and all Marty's information had to be obtained and off he went into the scan. The very first scan gave the answers they needed and so further scanning was not done. Unofficially, there is a "hot spot" at the cervical spine level. Officially, we know nothing until the radiologist reads it and the doctors see it. The drive home seemed much longer. It was dark and Marty was very quiet. I did what I could to encourage him to make up for the intake and meals he had missed and get him caught up on meds, but it was late, he was past tired and we are both discouraged. Just the thought of another surgery or procedure in store for him has knocked us down a peg or two.
I suggested that we should "SKIP" Christmas this year----taking the idea from the funny movie---Christmas with the Kranks--Skipping Christmas. The effort of the tree, decorating, cards, shopping and wrapping, baking and taking--------all just seems overwhelming. And....there is the fact that we do NOT know from day to day what will really happen, where we will be, what shape Marty will be in.....just so many unknowns. All our traditions of past years just don't seem so important or fitting this year. And yet,in reality, they are even MORE important now. Our hearts are filled with the spirit of Christmas and appreciation for all we have been blessed with in our lives. Christmas and family & friends just go hand in hand.
I may hatch a plan any minute, but I make no promises. My main objective for right now is getting him better, keeping him better and not adding stress to his already stressed body and mind. Putting up the tree and making Christmas Cake are just two of the things he has always been in charge of and would now be anxious to get done. I don't think that will be happening. He has now lost over 70 pounds and swallowing liquids and especially medicines is torture. Sad, because he has a TON of medicines to deal with. With each new challenge, his courage and determination is amazing.
I have often said through the years that Marty could do anything. The list of his skills and abilities is long and keeps growing. Just a few that come to mind are driving those big 18 wheelers for years, building our home, getting his pilot's licence, being able to fix most things----from the huge machines out at work to the smallest clasp on a necklace. The list is endless. Now, we can add cancer fighter to the list. He gets an A+ from this nurse on that one.
Please keep him in your prayers. You may have to consider our blog notes as your Christmas card from us this year.....I'm not sure yet. We appreciate each and every one of you and feel the love and support that has been extended to us. That has been one of the many blessings that have come with this illness.
Happy Holidays to you all. Love,
LaRee, and of course, Marty

December Is Here

Dear Friends and Family,
It seems unbeleivable that it is already December!! The year has flown by so fast and so much has happened. Marty came home from BLM Hospital on Nov 29th and has had his work cut out for him just taking all the medicine and drinking his nutrition and recuperating from the week's stay in the hospital. It took us a couple of days to get everything gathered up and organized to keep things as near as we could to his schedule in the hospital. His appetite and intake improved so much while he was there. We have had very few visitors as the Strep infection is so contagious and he just did not feel up to much. We feel that now antibiotics have been enforced for 10days, that he is not a risk to anyone. But, he is still fragile and does not want to get anything. This morning, he had a very unusual test-- hopefully to rule out osteomylitis. It is a nuclear medicine White Blood Cell scan. He had to be here at 7am to have blood drawn. Then, that blood was taken to Pocatello where the WBC's in the sample were radiolabeled. The blood was brought back to inject in Marty and then throughout the day, he will have radioimaging of his body to see where the WBC's go. I had never heard of this test and I think it is quite unusual. The technician told us he could be having scans as late as 10pm. Interesting.
Curtis helped get the Christmas "stuff" down from the rafters and we will now see who, if anyone, feels up to decorating. We have a beautiful tree up here in Dialysis. The season is upon us. I started to get in the Christmas spirit on Sunday. I sat by Steve in Sacrament Meeting. I bore my testimony, which I have not done for quite a few months. I have missed so many Sunday meetings. I DO HAVE A TESTIMONY AND KNOW we have alot to be grateful for. Love, LaRee and of course, Marty.